Inner tempests

-

So much has happened this week. I have been bombarded with yokes one after another--all trying to weigh me down. Business hangs in the balance. Office life has turned mayhem with all shameful squabbles and issues challenging the soldier in me. Mundane concerns try to knife healthy passions.

Businesswise, we have not received any good news from Jing's "business partners" whose transaction we hoped would change the entire landscape of Jing's businesses.We have been waiting and praying since June all along keeping our faith that everything would turn out as we hoped. Well, the waiting is still on, but one thing I am thankful for is the fact that the process we as a family went through and still go through is making us appreciative more of God's timing. How He has taught my hubby to wait patiently and trust everything to him is what delights me inwardly these days. Patience is a virtue that does not happen overnight and this was one area I was so pissed off with my man in the past (Gee, I was a victim of his impatience.He became my bf only after 12 days of our first meeting--shame!)

Work life on one hand has been coasting on rough waters. I have just received a transfer of assignment to Jail National Training Institute, apparently as a result of a colleague's bare-all (mostly made-up)senti against the FNTI management. How I was included in the personnel action (which to us at FNTI is tantamount to being guilty of violations--even without due process)baffle me. Yup, I can see evil at work in the midst of our work environs.For standing as witness in a case involving some workmates' dishonesty and misconduct--this is what I was rewarded with--a transfer of assignment. Whew, what's revolting is the recent "promotion" of guilty parties to juicy and more sensitive positions.Oh, where is the sense of fairness and righteousness here? What has been happening in the macro level of the Philippine government (i.e. lies, scams, dishonesty of officials,etc.) is clearly and exactly mirrored in a dwarf agency I belong to, as if unseen forces have virtually connived and colluded to invade every government instrumentality and institute a new order where unrighteousness is favored. Inwardly, I feel violated.I groan for justice.I long for righteousness to shine brightly in this dark, dark world.

Thanks to Pastor M, our guest preacher last Sunday on God's love and holiness. Regardless of what's happening around us -- she clearly emphasized that God is still on the throne! That was all I needed to hear to comfort the inner tempests in me.

Comments

Rean Tirol said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
September 21, 2008 at 5:46 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

This Beast Called Rage

-
Image
Blow one’s top Go berserk Let off steam Mad as a wet hen A bull in rampage These are the idoms in my writer’s tickler that fall under my scribbles on anger. Alongside are words evocative of the same meaning – rage, indignation, wrath, ire, fury. For the past weeks, I have been brooding over this negative emotion that has caused many an earthling to make brash decisions and actions that have damaging consequences. It has also caused needless grief and heartache. I have encountered people who often display this emotion – at school, at work, at home, in the grocery store, in the parking lot, in the restaurant—practically anywhere. I have also observed that its display is not confined to a particular class or age group. When piqued, kids fight back. When scolded, teens lash acerbic words. When bored or ignored, wives nag. Fathers spank. Bosses shout. Employees backbite. Soldiers shoot. Still, others kill. Where did this ticking time bomb of emotion originate? Why do we experie
Read more

Welcome back, blogger.

-
Image
Welcome back, twins. You've been on a four-month hiatus from blogging. Haven't you missed racking your brains trying to document moments of the "mist?" Do you think by putting off writing,err, blogging, you can get away with it? Nope. Been on holiday. Gotten into battle of wits against the simple (read: fools). Got stuck with domestic concerns. My hands were full, actually. A day never passed without coco exercise. Just scan through this list. 1. November --- The vagabonds were back to Mom's birthtown. We returned just in time for granny's 74th birthday celeb. After spending eight weeks in the pollution-free city-state, the kids crinched being greeted with the smog, noise and helter skelter of Manila. Orvik's skin asthma resurfaced, so march to the province did we, where the rustic ambience soothed our weary senses. 2. December -- First week we visited Aunti fashionista at MS after undergoing TAHBSO. By golly, the mas
Read more

The Natural Man (NM) and The Spiritual Man (SM)-- the War is On

-
Image
The battle that began in the cosmic arena rages in a believer's heart (mine in particular). For more than a decade, I have had countless inner struggles between the natural, old self and the spiritual, reborn man in me. I may have done such a fine job of looking together-- cool,calm and collected. Outwardly, I have managed to keep a tight rein on my deadly tongue, rebuked a fellow believer for some off-the-track dealings, turned a little preachy here and there and proclaimed all was well and good in my own sweet world. But in the dark of night, under my pungent blanket (thanks to my younger son's nightly response to the call of nature), the battle rages and overwhelms-like a breathtaking, action-packed movie scene that leaves me on the edge of my seat, ambivalent whether to sit still or take flight. Alone and uncovered before my maker,I finally feel the weight of this raging drama. I am no spectator. I am on center stage and my heart is the battle field. Forces from all
Read more